The Second Time Down

Life was going very well for me until last week. After receiving the devastating news from my Dad about my Mom’s cancer returning, all I could do was cry myself to sleep, and that is exactly where Danika found when she came back to the apartment last week. She said she knew something was wrong and had thought it was my ear ache coming back, but I told her no, it was much worse and then...the tears just fell uncontrollably.

She has never seen me fall asleep on the couch unless I was sick. After I had told her about the phone call with my Dad, she sat with me for a really long time. I just could not stop sobbing. I am so thankful for her. I know I have said this so many times, but when I need a friend, she is always there for me. As she usually does, she told me she would help me and suggested I go to Bible study with her again.

She urged me to go back to the Bible Study I had gone to with her several months ago, and I hadn’t gone back. She said at least try again and see if we can get some help. So I agreed to go. She has such a strong faith; I wish I had her faith now.

So, on Sunday afternoon, we head over to the hall where the service takes place every week. As the Pastor had asked us to do last time, we bowed our heads to pray an opening prayer. This time I bowed my head and kept my eyes shut! I needed help now more than ever. What else could I do?

As the Pastor opened up with his prayer for our group, he said something I hadn’t heard before...or maybe if I had, I don’t remember. Something about Exodus and God is Jehovah Rapha, the Lord Your God, The Healer. I couldn’t believe he said that. How did he know? I had just been asking for days how could I help my Mom? How could she be healed from this again? How is it possible that this Pastor would know that was the very question that had been on my mind for days!

I opened my eyes at that very minute as Danika squeezed my hand. I looked up to see everyone else’s eyes were closed! Is this faith? I can’t help but question it. Can God save my Mom? Would He heal her? Why would the Pastor say the exact thing I wanted to hear?

So many unanswered questions, but I know I will come back again next week to hear more! There is so much I need to learn.

I talked to my mom on Saturday night, and I could tell she was tired, and I could hear the worry in her voice. I tried to stay happy and upbeat and let her know everything was going to be okay! Maybe it is going to be alright? Maybe…I don't know!

.Lily